but people are concerned even though I haven't gone to them for help. they come to me. that makes me cry so hard. THEY come to ME.
Ive never relied on people like this. I hate doing it, but really, I've learned who is REALLY there. I am not able to give anything at all back as a friend, daughter, girlfriend, or anything, but there are still people who give me all the love and help that they can anyway. with nothing in return. I am overwhelmed, both at how sad ive become and that there are this many people to lift me up. like Jackie, even though we hardly see one another, I really feel like I could ask her for ANYTHING and she'd help me. what a lucky person I am. what a support system.
of course dave and mom, more than anyone, because it's affected their daily lives. dave literally always says the right thing. mom never gives up even though ive been angry all of the time and she has to put up with it every day, take me snapping at her, and hear my crying every day.